Gen. 3: 11-13 "Who?"- Shame part 2

Wearing shame.
It's revealing!
Revealing my own awareness of what I am not and what I am but wish I weren't, shame is sometimes  a result of accurate self-assessment and sometimes it is not.

My weaknesses make me feel shame. Every day provides ample opportunity for me to want to hide in the bushes. "I'm worthless. I'm pointless. I'm completely incapable." As a result, my gut response to confrontation is defensiveness: 
"Oh please don't tell me I let you down! Of course I did. I always do. I'm a failure. I'm...
ashamed."
My inadequacies cause other people hassle and pain; so I'd rather just go into hiding.
Joking and apathy are good hiding places; 
isolation is too.
When all else fails, blame may do the job.
Just like in the very first confrontation between God and man, 
following the very first game of hide and seek, blame became a tool of self-defense.

God: "Who?"

Adam: "...It was you! It was the woman!"
Eve: "...It was the serpent"

"Blaming or denigrating others serves to disown what the shameful person feels. Shame may lead a person to make attributions about others that are disguised attempts to restore a positive self-view or hide negative self-perceptions. In order to escape shame's self-diminishing effects, a person might instead denigrate others or express contempt toward them. Thus a person might attempt to bolster his own view of himself by finding flaws in others so that they become the one who is shameful." by Mary C. Lamia, Ph.D.

God in His infinite grace and mercy has compassion on us.

 Psalm 103: "An earthly father expresses love for his children;
    it is no different with our heavenly Father;
The Eternal shows His love for those who revere Him.
¹⁴ For He knows what we are made of;
    He knows our frame is frail, and He remembers we came from dust."

Psalm 100:3  "Know that the Lord, he is God!

It is he who made us, and we are his;

we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture."

³ "Psalm 139: 13-14 "For You shaped me, inside and out.
    You knitted me together in my mother’s womb long before I took my first breath.
¹⁴ I will offer You my grateful heart, for I am Your unique creation, filled with wonder and awe.
    You have approached even the smallest details with excellence;
    Your works are wonderful;
I carry this knowledge deep within my soul." The Voice

You see a "positive self-view" cannot start with the self and cannot end with the self. It must start with the One who made us and must end with the One who saves us. 

Ephesians 1:4 "...He chose us in Him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in His sight;"

Here's my take on a personal conversation following my own games of hide and seek-

Me: "Shake it off
the shame that plagues me
strip myself from
shame that weighs
Feigning virtues, 
blush betrays me
But I will not be 
the one to blame!"

Jesus: "Pick it up
and lay it on me!
stripped, I bore
the guilt that slays
claiming virtue
Love compels me
I'll be the One
to take your blame."

Isaiah 30:18The Voice (VOICE)

¹⁸     Meanwhile, the Eternal One yearns to give you grace and boundless compassion;
        that’s why He waits.
    For the Eternal is a God of justice.
        Those inclined toward Him, waiting for His help, will find happiness.

Gen. 3:7-9 "What's become of you?" - Shame part 1

Shame
It seems at times, I wear my life
like an ill-fitted garment.

Reluctant to reach if ripping
Unwilling to run if tripping

Afraid I'll be exposed or fall
But perhaps it's not the fit at all.


Leaves picked in newly private places.
Conscience pricked in freshly wrecked regard.
Contaminates contaminated.
Man, made from the dust...
found a dirty self unearthed
and he ran to bury it.
Everything right felt wrong.
Everything around them-wrong.
Everything between them-wrong.
Everything about them?
What would God, the only thing- the only one still right, think?

In the gentle breezes of the day, God's presence stirred the garden. No, He was not content to wind up his world like a clock and let it tick away like a bomb because God is not simply the Creator.
God is Father. On the day He was betrayed; God the Father pursued his children.
"Where are you?" or "What's become of you...why are you hiding?" God called to the man.
This was not a shattered God gasping, "For shame!"
This was a grieved God offering reconciliation.

And,
How like the Father is the Son who, though betrayed, calls His people out of hiding..."What's become of you? Come!"
How like the Father is the Son, who calls us back to freedom..."Why are you hiding? Come"!
He calls you back to all that's right...
He calls you back to life...
Come!
Revelation 2-3, 22:12-17

Silence of the man...

"...and she gave also to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it." Gen. 5:6b

Adam
First man ("Ish")
First hu-man (God-man)
alone...
But then
to complete God's image,
wo-man (Ishah- from man)
a helper (one to strengthen).
Eve lent not just hands for a task
Eve came alongside Adam,
who recognized his need of a fitted partner,
to empower him.
Together, given the command from
Creator, Father
"Be like me -
Give life
nurture life
manage my world."
Eve's design to em-power
became device to over-power.

By the power of speech,
God brought light into darkness
order into a holy mess-
earth.
By silence
Adam welcomed chaos back.

Why did the power of speech elude Adam at this critical moment? Perhaps Eve had discovered her womanly influence...
perhaps Adam thought: "to avoid conflict is the higher road", and seemingly without protest,
Adam joined his wife...
initiating conflict between God and his creation.
Eve was enticed into believing she needed more than she had; Adam seemed to believe Eve was all he needed. By stepping outside of God's Word, they stepped into a world without God.

Together they were given the world,
Together they gave it away.
Adam-First to omit
Eve-First to commit

How dare we blame God for the craziness of what's become of all His good beginnings...
for the end of good beginnings was the beginning man's of sin.

But God IS good,
and this story has a different ending;
God will speak
and His enemies will be silenced.

Rev. 21:3-5a "And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying,
"Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."
"He who is seated on the throne said,
'I am making everything new!'"

* A resource I used to write this blog is : The Silence of Adam by Dr. Larry Crabb


...

^{Gen. 3:6 "}When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to makeone wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. ⁷ Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves ^[b]loin coverings."

^{1 John 2:16 "}All the things the world can offer to you—the allure of pleasure, the passion to have things, and the pompous sense of superiority—do not come from the Father. These are the rotten fruits of this world." (The Voice)

one fruit
one lie
one choice

a feast 
for flesh 
for eyes

to gloat,
to glut
to prize

one heart
one mind
one voice

God offered Eve His world in love, to love Him. Eve grabbed at the world to love herself.
Anything you do that is ultimately motivated by devotion to yourself...your pleasure, your delight, your reputation...is an act of rebellion against your God. 
Eve's sin was not about the fruit. It was about Eve.
Selfishness can twist what God intended for good into evil- quick as you can say "ME". Worshipping ourselves makes us enemies of God. 
Telling ourselves that God exists to make us happy is not the Gospel. It is not good news if we are as big as the grand plan gets!
By all means embrace how God made you...because it honors Him.
By all means delight in the gifts He gives you...because they are from Him.
By all means make the most of the days He provides you...because they are for Him!
No, Victoria Osteen, God does not exist just to make sure you're happy. Believe it or not He is bigger than that.
Maybe,
"When you come to church and worship...think of it this way...yer not doin' it fer God, yer doin' it fer yerself....a-ME-in?"
But I want to choose to live for something, for Someone much bigger than me.

"Selfish ambition is a sin that always seems to be “crouching at the door” (Genesis 4:7). It contaminates our motives for doing just about anything..." Jon Bloom, DesiringGod.org
No one can serve two gods. 
Are you the only one you serve
or will you serve The One and Only? 

Word

"Every word of God is tested; He is a shield to those who take refuge in Him. Do not add to His words or He will reprove you, and you will be called a liar." Prov. 30: 2a, 3, 5-6
"Study to show thyself approved unto God..." 2 Tim. 2:15a

"Publish"
says the little orange rectangle at the top of my page.
I shutter, pray and click-
out go my thoughts to whomever clicks on the other side.
Scarey!
Did I get it right?
Did the words communicate God's heart, His truth?
Will it be read as it was meant?
Will I (or far worse, God) be misunderstood?
First I was a daughter and a youngest sister and I was taught but now I am also a pastor's wife, mother, friend, employee...
By default or intention, I teach.
By commission or omission,
by deeds or
by the power of a word,
I am a communication of thoughts about God.
Maybe when the tip of a finger hits the edge of a key there is a new level of responsibility, but as image bearers of God, we are all responsible. We are all publishers.
Adam was a publisher. He had understanding of God, he had a first-hand message of love and goodness for Eve but
Eve didn't get it right...
Gen. 3:3, "or touch it," she added.
Not quite Eve! (Gen. 2: 17)
In ignorance, Eve was as ripe for deception as the fruit for eating.
Her lack of understanding made wiggle room for lies.

God in His grace knows the dangers of ignorance. Ignorance leads to pride and pride to destruction. But God has a message; it's published...
for you.
It's called the Holy Bible.
It is the life of His Son.
It is understood through the power of His Spirit.

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word
was God." John 1:1

"What was from the beginning, what we have heard, what we have seen with our eyes, what we have looked at and touched with our hands, concerning the Word of life- and the life was manifested and we have seen and testify and proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and was manifested to us- what we have seen and heard we proclaim to you also, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father, and with His Son Jesus Christ." 1 John 1:1-3